artist ambition check: artist? ambition? check.

JR: How can I fix the world, I am just an artist.

Prize Director: No, no. You don’t need to FIX the world. You just need to CHANGE it.

on personal taste.

it’s not that i don’t like change. i LOVE change. i adapt quickly to new environments and take new responsibilities as challenges faced head on. sometimes, i change things up just for the hell of it. literally, the hell of it.

the thing is, i’ve always been awful at ending things. letting go of things. throwing things away, whether they’re past the point of tasteful rot or they’re perfectly healthy for someone who isn’t naturally allergic. jobs, relationships, things, people, memories, excuses, narratives; i hold on to good things until they’re too good to be true, and i hold on to bad things in the hopes that they’ll become good someday, someday, someday. it’s the only place where my patience lasts longer than my temper, where neither my logic, my heart, nor my deepest instinct ever have the right answer. not that i would even listen, anyway.

i hate times like these. they’re sour and bitter, salt in the wounds.
but then again, there is a sweet side - for some reason, i can finally write again.